Decisions, decisions, decisions

Wouldn't it be great to be four years old again, when the hardest decision to make is whether or not you want regular milk or chocolate milk with your lunch? To have the world be black and white with no shades of gray to muddy up the day? You knew if you hit your sister you'd get into trouble and if you ate all your veggies you'd get a high-five. Why would anyone want to grow up, to become an adult and have to face making decisions that could and would affect your life, big and small?

When you become a parent that role and responsibility takes on a much heavier weight because it's not just your life you're playing with. It's your child's life - how he views himself, how the world views him, how he makes decisions that will later affect his life, how he interacts with the world - all that falls on your shoulders. So of course you want to make the best decision possible. But no one can predict how a decision today will turn out tomorrow. All you have is the information you have in front of you, based on history and past behaviors, and you hope for the best. Sometimes it's a no-brainer: No soccer now. There's too much physical pushing and contact, and no kind of organization - just 40 kids globbing around a little ball - you'd hate it, trust me. Other decisions are much harder to make as a parent. Decisions involving family, friends, schools, teachers... decisions involving emotions.

But the responsibility is still there to protect the best interests of your child, regardless of how and where the chips fall, regardless of the aftermath. If you don't do it, then who will? As a parent of a young child, you must choose your child before all others, even before yourself. Even if that means siding with your child against family, friends, and those you hold dear. In a good situation, friends and family stand by you, with the understanding that it's your decision you're making for the benefit of your child even if they don't understand it. After all, you have been with your child since birth so who would know best what paths to take for success and what roads to avoid, knowing that to go down that road would cause more damage? That's the ideal. Unfortunately, life isn't about ideals. And sometimes you lose a little bit of... your happiness... in your pursuit to forge the best life for your family. I guess the question to ask is this: At the end of the day, when you weigh your happiness against your child's happiness what do you see?

Personally, if I could work it so it's balanced - that'd be great. But that's not always the case and so more often than not, I let my child's happiness tip the scales. And that's OK because when they are happy, then I am happy. That's what life is about, right?