Bossy. Bossy. Bossy.

"No cereal, Mama! I want waffles!"
"I want a fork!"
"I want the blue cup!"
"No milk! Orange juice, orange juice!"
"I want the red toothbrush!"
"I want to wear Crocs! No shoes!"
"Not this song! The Dragon Mountain song!"
"Dragon Mountain song AGAIN, Mama!"
"No shoes!! Bare feet!"
"Not this way, Mama! That way. THAT way!"
"No no, Mama. Sing this way, not like that. "
"No, like THIS, Mama."
"I want this shirt. Not that one."
"Not these pants. "
"Not this jacket. No, no jacket."

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My Responses:

"You asked for cereal. You are going to eat cereal. There are starving children in Africa who would love to eat your cereal. DON'T PUSH YOUR CEREAL AWAY! YOU'RE GOING TO SPILL IT!!"

"You can't eat cereal with a fork. Please use your spoon. No don't wave that spoon at me! PUT THAT SPOON DOWN! YOU'RE THROWING CEREAL EVERYWHERE!!"

"The blue cup is being used. Please drink from the red cup. DON'T YOU TIP THAT CUP OVER! I MEAN IT!"

"You drank all the orange juice last night. We don't have any more. Please drink your milk. Remember those starving children in Africa? They're thirsty too. I CAN'T GIVE YOU WHAT I DON'T HAVE! THERE'S NO MORE ORANGE JUICE! Please. Drink. Your. Milk."

"The red brush isn't yours. It isn't yours. The yellow toothbrush is yours. We don't share toothbrushes. DON'T YOU THROW THAT YELLOW BRUSH ON THE GROUND!"

"You can't wear Crocs. They don't fit you. You need to wear your shoes. DON'T TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF!"

"OK. But this is the last time we're listening to Dragon Mountain. The LAST time."

"No! We're not listening to Dragon Mountain anymore! You've already heard it 4 times. That's it! NO. MORE."

"PUT YOUR SHOES BACK ON! WE ARE AT THE STORE! DO NOT TAKE THEM OFF! PUT THEM BACK ON RIGHT NOW! COME BACK HERE AND PUT YOUR SHOES BACK ON!!"

"We're going home now. That's not the right way. We have to go this way. We'll drive that way tomorrow. No, we're not driving that way. We're driving this way. THIS WAY."

"I did sing it that way!"

"I DID sing it like that! Listen!"

"OK, fine. You can wear that shirt. Let's change it but hurry up. We're late for school."

"No, we're not changing pants too. We're late for school. NO! KEEP YOUR PANTS ON! I MEAN IT!"

"You have to wear a jacket. It's too cold outside. COME BACK HERE!!"

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That's my day in a nutshell.

I am the Mommy.
I am the Boss.

Was that memo misplaced?
She's not even 2 and already she's a holy terror.