Hot Sauce Hell

If you haven't guessed from my For Sale post I've been butting heads with Kael. And he's taken his bad attitude to school to share the love.

Thursdays we have a standing date with Westin. I take Kael out of school early (11:30am) and we meet Westin and Rylan for lunch and a play date at a nearby park until 1:30pm. The kids love it and it's nice to have Kael reconnect with his buddy he's known since practically birth. Today when I came to pick him up I saw Kael sitting by himself on the ledge looking very glum, with a sprinkling of pissed off. I figured maybe this was because his classmates were all eating and he was waiting for me by himself. As I walked over to him, Mrs. Morin (his teacher) intercepted me and said she wanted to talk to me about Kael.

Oh great, I thought. We had some issues with Kael not wanting to do his school work a few weeks ago but I thought all that was resolved with his Happy Face Chart (fill up a week with happy faces and get a reward, get a sad face and no TV, no books). Instead Mrs. Morin tells me that Kael's been annoying his friends. He's been repeating everything they say despite them asking him to stop. Repeatedly. Even when she asked him to stop, he didn't. In addition, he kept hitting his Weekly Reader (his school book) despite Mrs. Morin asking him to stop. Repeatedly. So he didn't get a Star Point today for good behavior even though he got a Happy Face for doing his work.

I'm surprised at his behavior -- but not surprised as I've been the unfortunate recipient of his aggravating "coppering" game (that's how he pronounces "copying"). He repeats what you say as you say it. To say that it bugs the crap out of me would be an understatement. Not only is he not listening to what I'm saying, but he's also mocking me! It completely enrages me.

So I'm listening to Mrs. Morin and over her shoulder I can see my kids sort of playing. Kael's still sitting on the ledge that bisects the eating area and the playground. Malia tries to climb up next to him and I can see her throwing her leg up. Kael (for reasons only Satan and his disciples would know) decides to wrap his arms around her waist and flips her to ground. She rolls a couple of times and ends up on her tummy in the wood chips. She looks dazed, as if not understanding how she went from an upright position one second, to her hands and knees, face deep in the chips the next. But he's not finished with her. He proceeds to sit where she was trying to get to and with a smirk on his face, starts throwing wood chips on her back. As she's still on the ground.

I see red. Hell fire red. I swear steam is shooting out of my ears. I excuse myself from Mrs. Morin mid-conversation and stalk over to Kael. I drag him over to the fence and rail into him: "What do you think you're doing?! Why did you throw your sister to the ground?! What's gotten into you?! You know better!" and the coup de grace: "That's it! No park date with Westin! We're going home and you're in big trouble young man!"

It bothers me a little that while he showed an itty-bitty bit of contrition in regards to his treatment of Malia (I could be wrong though -- maybe he was just plain scared because I was really pissed), the real tearjerker was the play date cancellation. Boy he really wailed at that one. I picked up Malia, brushed her off and stalked away. I looked back and snapped: "Let's go. Now." He shuffles after me, crying still, reluctant to follow, knowing what was waiting for him at home, but too afraid not to.

We're in the car, I'm still steaming, and Kael's in a sullen silence. He clearly knows he did wrong but was unable (or unwilling) to ask for forgiveness or admit his wrongdoing. Undoubtedly I needed to nip this new behavior now. I should have done it from the beginning but I figured it was another annoying phase he was going through and didn't take it past the point of verbal reprimanding. It was crystal clear that I needed to take it to the next level: Hot Sauce.

Hot sauce on the tongue is used for oral infractions, ranging from spitting to biting to saying bad words. I've broken many a bad habits with my trusty bottle of Sarachi hot sauce.

We get home and I have him wash his hands. Once the HS hits his tongue, his hands go in there too and I don't need him getting sick on top of everything else. That would just be my luck, wouldn't it?? The rule is a minute for every year of age. He doesn't get that rule yet, but I'm hoping when he gets the concept of time (as he gets older, adding on the minutes) we won't have to employ this disciplinary action any more.

It's a long painful 4 minutes for everyone involved and while he's drooling and spitting and crying, I go over the events of the the past 30 minutes with him (the copying of his classmates, the disrespect of his teacher, the tossing of Malia) and make him respond to my questions: Why did you get HS? Did they ask you to stop? Did you stop? Why didn't you stop? What would have been a better choice? What should you have done? Were you being a good friend/student/brother? All while he's crying and rubbing his tongue on his sleeve.

I finally release him to drink some milk and we start eating lunch. My sister calls and I chat with her. I say something, I don't remember what, but it was something animated.

And he repeated it. He coppered me!

I was shocked. I stopped talking and looked at him in disbelief. He had a popcorn chicken in his hands with a smirk on his face. The gleam in his eyes faded a bit when he realized I was staring at him in disbelief. I could see him mentally reviewing what just happened in the past 10 seconds and it slowly dawned on him, as evidenced by his widening eyes.

I hang up on my sister and I said to him in disbelief: You copied me! I can't believe you just copied me!!
He starts to panic: No, I didn't Mom! I didn't! I didn't mean to! I didn't!!
Me: You get hot sauce again!

And we added another 4 minutes. I hope he's a fast learner because at the rate he's going now, we're going to need to buy another bottle soon.

Tomorrow is a new day.
Tomorrow is a new day.